Gifts for a Best Friend Who Is Moving Away

The best gift for a best friend who is moving away does three things: it weighs almost nothing (she already has too many boxes), it makes the new place feel a little less strange, and it comes with the date you'll see each other next. Below are ideas for each, from a box for her first night to a piece of home she can take with her, plus some words for the goodbye card.

The golden rule: it has to fit in a suitcase

Your friend is packing up her whole life. The last thing she needs is something big and breakable. Before you buy anything, ask: does this fit flat in a suitcase or an envelope? If not, find something else, or ask for her new address and send it there.

A box for the first night

The first night in a new home is strange: nothing can be found and everything is in boxes. Pack her a box marked "open me first":

• Toilet paper and a nice bar of soap.
• A spare phone charger.
• A mug, coffee or tea, and something sweet.
• A small candle and matches.
• Her favorite snack, the one you always share.
• A note in your handwriting, right on top, so it's the first thing she sees.

It's the most useful gift on this list, and the one she'll be most grateful for that night.

A piece of home to take along

What she'll miss isn't the house. It's her routine with you and the town around it.

• Coffee from her favorite local spot, sealed, for the first morning.
• The hot sauce, the candy or the cookie you can only get where you live.
• A recipe from your family in your handwriting, for the homesick days.
• A printed photo of the two of you, with the date and place written on the back. On a phone it gets lost; on a new fridge, it doesn't.
• A map of your old neighborhood with your favorite places circled: the diner, the park bench, the parking lot where you talked for three hours.

Something to keep you close

• A calendar with the calls already in it. One a month, with a date and time. The next call is never a "we should".
• Postcards addressed to you, stamps on. Ten postcards ready for her to send from her new city. Paper takes longer, which is exactly why it feels better.
• The same book for both of you, read at the same time and talked about in voice notes.
• Letters to open later: "open on your first day", "open when you miss me", "open when you make your first friend there". That last one is the hardest to write and the one she'll keep longest.

A print of two friends who stay the same

We make prints of Capy and Bara, two capybara best friends. Capy is calm and always waits; Bara never stops moving and always comes back. In the print in the photo, the two of them walk side by side under the words "New address. Same us." It's flat, so it won't get in the way of the move. Add one name or both, pick the color, and either collect it with Same Day Pickup at a store near you to hand over at the goodbye, or have it mailed free to her new address anywhere in the 50 states, so it's waiting when she arrives. See the prints.

The gift that matters most: the next date

Before she leaves, decide when you'll see each other. Not "someday": a month, a weekend, who's flying. Write it on a card and give it with everything else. A friendship like a cactus doesn't need watering every day, but it does need to know when the next rain is coming.

When December comes around, there are ideas for Christmas gifts for a long-distance best friend, with this year's mailing dates.

For the goodbye card

This isn't goodbye. It's "see you at a new address".

You're taking all your boxes, but I'm keeping all our memories. We'll keep adding to them.

Your new city has no idea how lucky it is.

Call me when you land. And tomorrow. And the day after that.

Same inside jokes, different zip code.